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Big River
Music & Lyrics by Roger Miller
Book by William Hauptman
Based on The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
Opened April 25, 1985 at the Eugene O'Neill Theatre and ran for 1,005 performances
Overture
Do ya wanna go to heaven?
The boys
Waitin' for the light to shine
Guv'ment
Hand for the hog
I, Huckleberry, me
Muddy water
The crossing
River in the rain
When the sun goes down in the south
Entracte
The royal nonesuch
Worlds apart
Arkansas
How blest we are
You oughta be here with me
Leavin's not the only way to go
Waitin' for the light to shine (Reprise)
Free at last
Muddy water (Reprise)
DO YA WANNA G0 TO HEAVEN
(Roger Miller)
Looka here Huck, do you wanna go to heaven
Do you wanna go to heaven
Well I'll tell you right now
You better learn to read and you better learn your writin'
Or you'll never get to heaven cause you won't know how
You may think that the whole thing is silly
But it ain't silly really and I'll tell you right now
If you don't learn to read then you can't read your Bible
And you'll never get to heaven cause you won't know how
Looka here Huck, now you better think it over
Do ya wanna be a loafer like your pappy is now
You better learn to read and you better know your writin'
Or you'll never get to heaven cause you won't know how
Hey, hey do ya wanna go to heaven
Do ya wanna go to heaven
If you don't go to hell
Looka here Huck, do you wanna go to heaven
Do you wanna go to heaven
Well I'll tell you right now
You better learn to read and you better learn your writin'
Or you'll never get to heaven cause you won't know how
You may think that the whole thing is silly
But it isn't silly really and I'll tell you right now
If you don't learn to read then you can't read your Bible
You'll never get to heaven cause you won't know how
Looka here Huck, now you better think it over
Do ya wanna be a loafer like your poppy is now
You better learn to read and you better learn your writin'
Or you'll never get to heaven cause you won't know how
Hey, hey ain't the situation concernin' education aggravatin' and how
Do you wanna go to heaven
Well you better get your lessons or you won't know how
Looka here Huck, do you wanna be a feller
Like a feller really ought to be
I'll tell you right now,
You better learn to read and you better learn your writin'
Or you'll never get to heaven cause you won't know how
THE BOYS
(Roger Miller)
If the bunch of us all stick together
And we all go down as one
We could be highway robbers
We could be killers just out to have fun
And if any of you can't keep a secret
We'll cut your throat if you tell
Then lay down 'neath six feet of ground
'Cause we were born to raise hell
Chorus:
All together now were the boys
All together forever and always
All together now we are the boys
We're together forever and always
If the bunch of us all, now listen,
'Cause here's the part I like the best
If we all got a hold of some horses
We could ride like the boys out West
We could hoot shoot, and we could holler
We could ride like the devil wind
Then go back to the cove and sleep all day
And do it the next night again
(Repeat Chorus)
If the bunch of us all stick together
And we all go down as one
We could be highway robbers
We could be killers just out to have fun
And if the bunch of us all form a circle
And surround all the ladies of the town
I said hey, hey hey we'll take them to the cove
And dance them till they all fall down
(Repeat Chorus Twice)
WAITIN' FOR THE LIGHT TO SHINE
(Roger Miller)
I have lived in the darkness for so long
I am waitin' for the light to shine
Far beyond horizons I have seen
Beyond the things I've been
Beyond the dreams I've dreamed
Are the things I've done
In fact each and every one
Are the way that I was taught to run
Chorus:
I am waitin' for the light to shine
I am waitin' for the light to shine
I have lived in the darkness for so long
I'm waitin' for the light to shine
GUV'MENT
(Roger Miller)
Well, you dad gum guv'ment
You sorry so and so's
You got your damn hands in every pocket
Of my clothes
Well you dad gum, dad gum, dad gum, guv'ment
Oh, don't I you know
Oh, don't you love 'em sometimes
You dad gum guv'ment
You better pay attention
You're sittin' up there like a fool's convention
Well, you dad gum, dad gum, dad gum guv'ment
Oh don't you know
Oh don't you love 'em sometimes
Well, you soul sellin' no good
Sons-of-a dead pan shoe fittin' fire starters
I ought to tear your no good God dang
Preambulatory bone frame
And nail it to your guv'ment walls
All of you, you, bastards
You dad gum guv'ment
You sorry rakafratchits
You got yourself an itch
And you want me to scratch it
Well, you dad gum, dad gum, dad gum guv'ment
Oh, don t you know
Oh don't you love 'em sometimes
You dad gum guv'ment
You sorry sons-of-bitches
You got your damn hands in every pocket of my britches
Well, you dad gum, dad gum, dad gum guv'ment
Oh don't you know, don't you love 'em sometimes
HAND FOR THE HOG
(Roger Miller)
Well, I always heard but I ain't too sure
That a man's best friend is a mangy cur
I kinda favor the hog myself
How about a hand for the hog
Ya say, a hog ain't nothin' but a porky thing
Little forked feet with a nosey ring
Pickle them feel folks
How about a hand for the hog
If you took a notion I'll bet
A good hog would moke a hell of a pet
You could teach him to ride and hunt
You could clean him up and let him sit up front
In the scheme of things the way things go
You might get bit by the old Fido
But not by the gentle, porker friend.
How about a hand for the hog
A feller and a hog had a comedy act
The feller was terrible as a matter of fact
That hog was o funny sucker though
How about a hand for the hog
If you took a notion
I'll bet you could teach a hog to smoke a cigarette
Well, it might take a little bit of time
But hell, what's time to a hog
Well, the way I see it, it looks like this
Either you ain't or either you is
A true blue lover of the swine, folks
How about a hand for the hog
I, HUCKLEBERRY, ME
(Roger Miller)
I, Huckleberry, me
Somewhere sittin' underneath some tree
Somewhere maybe fishin'
Maybe someplace sittin' just wishin' I was fishin'
Oh, I, Huckleberry, me
Hereby declare myself to be
Nothin' ever other than
Exactly what I am
And I'll never change for no one
No matter what they say
If I want to smoke in church I'll smoke
If I want to pray I'll pray, oh
I, Huckleberry, me
Hereby declare myself to be
Nothin' ever other than
Exactly what I am
And I'll never change for no one
No matter what they say
If I want to go to school I'll go
If I want to stay away, I'll stay
Oh, I, Huckleberry, me
Hereby declare myself to be
Nothin' ever other than
Exactly what I am
Nothin' ever other than
Exactly what I am
MUDDY WATER
(Roger Miller)
CHORUS:
Look out for me, oh muddy water
Your mysteries are deep and wide
And I got a need for going some place
And I got a need to climb upon your back and ride
You can look for me when you see me comin'
I may be runnin' I don't know
I may be tired and runnin' fever
But I'll be headed south to the mouth of the Ohio
Look out for me, oh muddy water
Your mysteries are deep and wide
And I got a need for going some place
And I got a need to climb upon your back and ride
Well, I been down to the pain and sorrow
Of no tomorrows comin' in
But I put my pole to the river bottom
And I've got to hide some place and find myself again
Look out for me, oh muddy water
Your mysteries are deep and wide
And I got a need for going some place
And I got a need to climb upon your back and ride
THE CROSSIN'
(Roger Miller)
Crossing to the other side
We are pilgrims
On a journey through the darkness of the night
We are bound for other places
Crossing to the other side
I will worry 'bout tomorrow
When tomorrow comes in sight
Until then, Lord, I'm just a pilgrim
Crossing to the other side
Jesus will be there to meet me
He will reach his hand in mine
I will no more be a stranger
When I reach the other side
RIVER IN THE RAIN
(Roger Miller)
CHORUS:
River in the rain
Sometimes at night you look like a long white train
Winding your way away somewhere
River I love you don't you care
If you're on the run winding some place
Just trying to find the sun
Whether the sunshine, whether the rain
River I love you just the same
But sometimes in a time of trouble
When you're out of hand
And your muddy bubbles roll across my floor
Carryin' away the things I treasure
Hell, there ain't no way to measure
Why I love you more than I did the day before
River in the rain
Sometimes at night you look like a long white train
Winding your way away somewhere
River I love you, don't you care
But sometimes in a time of trouble
When you're out of hand
And your muddy bubbles roll across my floor
Carryin' away the things I treasure
Hell, there ain't no way to measure
Why I love you more than I did the day before
River in the rain
Sometimes at night you look like a long white train
Winding your way away from me
River, I've never seen the sea
WHEN THE SUN GOES DOWN IN THE SOUTH
(Roger Miller)
When the sun goes down in the south
And the moon comes up in the East
Step right up and see the wonder of the ages
It's guaranteed visual feast
CHORUS:
When the darkness falls on the town
And the North Star's startin' to rise
Well, you can't imagine the menagerie aire
Created by a couple of guys
Well, anybody wonderin' what they're going to see
Gonna have to ante up a dollar for the ticket
Anybody wonderin' who's goin' on
Is gonna find out when they chase us through the thicket
(REPEAT CHORUS)
When the sun goes down in the South
And the hayseeds stand in line
Well, step right up and see the duo bodily do
The do wah ditty on the clothesline
(REPEAT CHORUS)
When the darkness falls on the town
And the North Star's startin' to rise
Oh, you can't imagine the menagerie aire
Created by a couple of guys
(REPEAT 1ST VERSE AND CHORUS)
Well anybody wonderin' what they' re going to see
Gonna have to ante up a dollar for the ticket
Anybody wonderin' who's goin' on
They're gonna find out when they're chasin' us through the thicket
When the sun goes down in the South
And the North Star's startin' to rise
Oh, you can't imagine the menagerie aire
Created by a couple of guys
(REPEAT 1ST VERSE AND CHORUS)
ACT TWO
ENTR'ACTE
[Orchestra]
THE ROYAL NONESUCH
(Roger Miller)
She's got one big breast in the middle of her chest
And an eye in the middle of her nose
So says I, if you look her in the eye
You're better off looking up her nose
Whoever you are, wherever you've been
You've come this far
Well, come on in
See the nonesuch
I get up early, I stay up late
I've seen it before
But I still can't wait
To see the nonesuch
(REPEAT CHORUS)
Because the nonesuch will be exhibited in a state of nature
No ladies will be permitted
But the education of no man or boy is complete
Until he has witnessed this shocking spectacle
Believe you me
It's the best of the best
I know what I'm saying I've seen the rest
The nonesuch
It'll strike you blind
With a heave and a sigh
But come up close enough
To risk one eye
For the nonesuch
She's got hound dog ears that hang down to here
And lips like the bud of a rose
So says I, if you look her in the eye
You're better off looking up her nose
Only fifty cents, the one half port of o dollar
Servants ten cents
I've been to Natchez and to New Orleans
But this beats anything I've ever seen
The nonesuch
I've your money, I can see your face
Now come on in and take your place
For the nonesuch
Well, it ain't no woman and it ain't no man
And it don't wear very many clothes
So says I, if you look her in the eye
You're better off looking up her nose
WORLDS APART
(Royn Miller)
JIM:
I see the same stars through my window
That you see through yours
But we're worlds apart
Worlds apart
And I see the same skies through brown eyes
That you see through blue
But we're worlds apart, worlds apart
Just like the earth, just like the sun
Two worlds together are better than one
I see the sun rise in your eyes
That you see in mine
But we're worlds apart, worlds apart
HUCK:
I see the same stars through my window
That you see through yours
But we're worlds apart, worlds apart
BOTH:
And you see the same skies through brown eyes
That I see through blue
But we're worlds apart, worlds apart
Just like the earth, just like the sun
Two worlds together are better than one
I see the friendship in you eyes
That you see in mine
But we're worlds apart, worlds apart
Together, but worlds apart
And a mockingbird sings in an ol' yonder tree
Twaddle-ee ah dee dee dah dee dee dee
ARKANSAS
(Roger Miller)
Arkansas, Arkansas
I lust love ole Arkansas
Love my ma, love my pa
But I just love ole Arkansas
Well, I ain't never traveled much
But someday when the money's such
I'd like to see the world and all
And take a run through Arkansas
I'd like to get my picture took
And put in it my memory book
And someday hang it on my wall
To say that I'd seen Arkansas
Arkansas, Arkansas
I lust love ole Arkansas
Love my ma, love my pa
But I just love ole Arkansas
Grandpa he has always good
I'd play horsey on his foot
He'd tell me when I'd get tall
We'd both go see Arkansas
Arkansas, Arkansas
I lust love ole Arkansas
Love my ma, love my pa
But I just love ole Arkansas
Arkansas, Arkansas
I lust love ole Arkansas
Love my ma, love my pa
But I just love ole Arkansas
I just love ole Arkansas
HOW BLEST WE ARE
(Roger Miller)
How blest we are
As children of a God so good and true
To understand his moving hand
And, love for me and you
How blest we are
As children of a God
Whose love is real
Enough to touch each one of us
Is part of him I feel
I honor thee
I honor thee
To whom my love is vowed
How blessed be
Forever we are bound to him as now
YOU OUGHTA BE HERE WITH ME
(Roger Miller)
If you think it's lonesome where you are tonight
Then you oughta be here with me
If you think there's heartaches where you are tonight
Then you oughta be here with me
CHORUS:
Because with you I'm whole, without you I'm cold
So if you think about me where you are tonight
Then you oughta be here with me
If teardrops are falling where you are tonight
Then you oughta be here with me
Loneliness calling where you are tonight
Then you oughta be here with me
CHORUS:
Because with you I'm whole, without you I'm cold
So if you think about me where you are tonight
Then you oughta be here with me
LEAVIN'S NOT THE ONLY WAY TO G0
(Roger Miller)
Did the morning come too early
Was the night not long enough
Does a tear of hesitation
Fall on everything you touch
Well, it might just be a lesson
For the hasty heart to know
Maybe leavin's not the only way to go
Maybe lay and let your feelings grow accustomed to the dark
Maybe morning's light, you just might solve the problems of the heart
And it all might be a lesson for the hasty heart to know
Maybe leavin's not the only way to go
People reach new understandings all the lime
They take a second look, maybe change their minds
People reach new understandings everyday
Tell me not to reach and I'll go away
Did the morning come too early
Was the night not long enough
Does a tear of hesitation
Fall on everything you touch
Well, it might just be a lesson
For the hasty heart to know
Maybe leavin's not the only way to go
And a heart without a home is such a lonesome row to hoe
Maybe leavin's not the only way to go
WAITIN' FOR THE LIGHT TO SHINE
(Roger Miller)
Well, I have lived on undirected life
A cloudy way I know, the only way I knew
And so the thing I've done
In fact each and every one
Is the way that I was taught to run
I am waitin' for the light to shine
I am waitin' for the light to shine
I have lived in the darkness for so long
I'm waitin' for the light to shine
Far beyond horizons I have seen
Beyond things I've been
Beyond the dreams I've dreamed
Are the things I've done
In fact each and every one
Are the way that I was taught to run
I am waitin' for the light to shine
I am waitin' for the light to shine
I have lived in the darkness for so long
I'm waitin' for the light to shine
I am waitin' for the light to shine
I am waitin' for the light to shine
I have lived in the darkness for so long
I'm waitin' for the light to shine
FREE AT LAST
(Roger Miller)
I wish by golly I could spread my wings and fly
And let my grounded soul be free for just a little while
To be like eagles when they ride upon the wind
And taste the sweetest taste of freedom for my soul
CHORUS:
Then I'd be free at last, free at last
Great God Almighty I'd be free at last
To let my feelings lie where harm can not come by
And hurt this always hurtin' heart
That needs to rest awhile
I wish by golly I could spread my wings and fly
And taste the sweetest taste of freedom for my soul
CHORUS:
Then I'd be free at last, free at last
Great God Almighty I'd be free at last
I'd be free at last, free at last
Great God Almighty I'd be free at last
(REPEAT CHORUS)
MUDDY WATER (Reprise)
(Roger Miller)
Well, I been down to the pain and sorrow
Of no tomorrows comin' in
But I put my pole to the river bottom
And I've got to hide some place and find myself again
So, look out for me, oh muddy water
Your mysteries are deep and wide
And I got a need for going some place
And I got a need to climb upon your back and ride
(REPEAT)